Jane - Mosaic in the Mirror
by Jane Spalding

Turner took the boy's face and left a mosaic in the mirror; a red-haired elfin girl in the place of a human male. Staring, I wonder for the thousandth time what he would have looked like had Turner not interfered.

He might have grown tall and strong, agile and quick. Missing his "Y"s, however, I struggled for life in the womb. At two I was 18 pounds. At nine I wore a 6x. Elder brother is six foot. I'm 5 and a half and an inch of that is from the lack of hormones.

A face joins mine in the mirror, drawing me out of my mood. Kissing my cheek, my husband says "You're beautiful." Turning from the mirror I embrace him and whisper "I love you."

Isn't this what life is about? Being a wife and mother was what I had always wanted. Now I'm a wife. I glance back at the mirror, smiling now. The Lord meant my mosaicism for my good. I should be more thankful for all He's given me.

My heart and kidneys are malformed but they haven't been much trouble yet. Yes, I take pills to keep my heartbeat regular. But my heart is strong. I take pills for my thyroid. I take pills for my cholesterol. I wear a patch for HRT. I've learned to compensate for my poor sense of smell, my dyslexia, my total lack of a sense of direction, and even my lack of sweat glands.

But I have to be careful not to live in the past. That's easy for me and I think that's because I've had such a wild ride. There's a temptation to look back and wonder "What if?". And there's a tendency to watch life pass by without getting involved.

My husband keeps me rooted in the present with a view to the future. He reminds me of who I am in Christ; that life really is worth living. He gently leads me by the hand. "Glorify God and enjoy Him forever.".